A Mother’s Pain

by | Oct 14, 2015 | Articles

One of the most devastating events that happened to me as a mom and the mom of an athlete was when my son Jordan became ill. It was during his fourth year in the league while he was playing with the Washington Redskins. Jordan was playing well in the pre-season, so much so, that he was told he was going to start. It was a very good time for Jordan and our family. After years of hard work and determination, my son was finally getting a break! His years of hard work and determination were paying off.

That suddenly changed during Memorial Day weekend in 2013. Jordan came home for a visit and said he felt a bit off. His ear was bothering him. It didn’t seem like a big deal, so I continued with my plans to go away for the weekend. But over the span of a few days his condition worsened and he could no longer stand on his own. Jordan said it felt like the room was spinning. He had to call 911 to be taken to the hospital. He was diagnosed with Labyrinthitis, an inner ear problem that causes severe vertigo and potential hearing loss. 

When I was able to get to my son, what I saw was disturbing. My son, who has always been a virile athlete, couldn’t do anything for himself. His equilibrium was impaired and he could not sit up or walk on his own. I had to completely care for him for two weeks. I am a nurse and I was happy to do it, but on his fourth day of being ill Jordan could no longer hear out of one ear. Seeing my son this way was heart wrenching. As a mom, I never felt more helpless. There was nothing I could do to help my son. 

After weeks of treatment and several trips to specialists, doctors predicted Jordan might get some of his hearing back, but some hearing loss was almost certain. Almost immediately, Jordan’s football career was in jeopardy. He missed a week of training camp. He worried about being cut from the team. Throughout June and July, Jordan trained and slowly and through God’s grace and mercy miraculously got better. He played for the first part of the season with the Redskins before being cut. He was called back a week later then cut from the team again after just one game and an interception against Peyton Manning. 

Jordan finished the season playing for the New Orleans Saints. He has been a free agent since the 2014 season. These days, Jordan is a Game Day Analyst for Aggie Game Day, has a weekly radio show and continues to work out to stay in shape for his call to the next NFL team.  He has gotten very positive feedback on his broadcasting work. He also wears a hearing aid. 

As a mom, I wanted to fix my son’s challenge. But like so many things in life, it was out of my control. I couldn’t control that Jordan had to undergo painful injections in his ear. Watching him endure those hurt me. It was also hard to see him so encouraged by developments in his career then let down as his dreams were taken away in a heartbeat.

I went through a range of emotions too. I have experienced guilt – as a nurse, did I ignore signs of an illness? I have also been bitter – did Jordan’s doctors and team trainers overlook something? I was also angry with God. Why did this happen to my son? My advice to all moms watching their child go through difficulties is to be encouraged by the power of prayer and to trust the Lord for His divine wisdom and mercy. My son was willing to fight to get better, which helped me. I wanted to protect him, but looking back now, I know that we have to let our children go through some painful things. Our job as parents is to be there to help them heal and recover.